In this paper, we draw on narrative correspondence from older male spousal caregivers and interviews with care providers from the voluntary and statutory sectors to explore how older male carers in the UK cope with and experience care-giving, the forms of support they draw upon, and how this impacts on their sense of self and identity as older men. We also consider how (or if) gender plays a part in shaping the forms of formal care support extended to male carers. We conclude, that how older men construct and perform care-giving, and how the wider family and community responds to older men as carers, can impact on how they perform masculinity. This in turn can contribute to a decline in their social networks and opportunities for sociability, leading to increased loneliness and social isolation. Such insights are important if we are to enrich our knowledge of the challenges they face, the coping mechanisms they employ, and the extent to which their support needs are met in their caring role.