This paper explores the employment of communication, engagement and relationship-based practice skills by a Flemish social worker working with a parent who was alleged to have assaulted his child. We deploy insights gained from ethnomethodology to analyse extracts from an ethnographic observation. We show how a respectful approach can be developed between two parties who seek to find meaning from the chain of events they are presented with. In doing so, we establish how practice can be conducted differently depending on the context in which professionals and families find themselves in. We argue that social workers’ identities revolve around being competent members of their professional community by working within the recommended guidelines and keeping children safe. However, this does not mean that organisational rules determine the activities that take place. Instead, we show how social workers can use their experience and skills to develop effective working relationships and still achieve their intended outcomes without blaming or shaming parents.